EVER since I got that letter from Zac about joining my fan club I’ve had lots of people emailing, following, twittering, writing and stopping me in the street asking about when Frankie’s Fan Club will be starting up.
Now, I’m not saying there is going to be fan club. OK? But the things I’m about to mention are the kind of things we might maybe do IF I started a fan club.
First of all you would pay to become a member of Frankie’s Fan Club and you might get a certificate or something.
Then you could pay extra for other exciting things like.
Eat with Frankie
You could bring me some food at breakfast or dinner time and watch me eat it.
I like: raw red meat (lean beef or lamb), fish, chicken, carrots, bananas, apples, pears, rice, porridge, shredded wheat, broccoli, pears, pasta (cooked or not), those polony type of dog sausage things, liver treats, dry dog food, yoghurt, bread, toast and Vegemite, cheese, tomatoes, potato peel, roast potato, pumpkin, peas, beans and probably some other stuff I can’t remember.
I don’t like: lettuce (stupid food I reckon), cucumber (no thanks), mushrooms (they taste like dirt), capsicum (who made them up? And in lots of colours!). Oh, and oranges and lemons.
I can’t eat but would probably like: chocolate, nuts, sultanas and grapes.
After you watch me eat you could go home. Should take about a minute. Less if the food is easy to eat or there’s not much of it.
Run with Frankie
Soon I’ll tell you about an exciting development in my musical career. People often remark about my voice. “That’s very loud Frankie.” “That went right through me Frankie.” Maybe a member of the fan club could record a song with me. This would be very expensive obviously.
Photo with Frankie
You come to Fremantle Oval in your Dockers gear and I sit on your lap and a real photographer takes our photo – not your mum with her mobile phone.
Watch Frankie sleep
I was going to call this one Sleep with Frankie but Pav said that wasn’t a good idea for some reason. Micky Barlow reckoned it would be perfect but I got suspicious when he started giggling. Whatever. Apart from being quick, cute and having a big leap and solid bump I am, according to Ross, an elite sleeper. If you’re lucky you might see me run to my bed and start snoring within 20 seconds. However the chances are that I’ll be asleep when you arrive.
None of this might happen but if ever there is a Frankie’s Fan Club you could look forward to these and more. Let me know what you think.
I almost forgot this week’s game. It’s the derby and it’s Barra Mundy’s 200th game. I have this to say about the derby…
We are under no illusions. The Eagles are coming into some good form and they are a quality outfit. In derbies it doesn’t matter where you are on the ladder. West Coast are still a big chance for the finals and they have a lot to play for. We just have to think about the next training session. Did I mention we’re under no illusions.